You likely keep attracting emotionally unavailable partners because your nervous system associates inconsistency with love based on childhood imprints. While you may consciously desire a steady partner, your subconscious mind views the 'chase' as a familiar safety, often misinterpreting the lack of anxiety in healthy relationships as a lack of chemistry. You ended the last one swearing it would be the last one. You went quiet for a while, did the work, read the books, journalled until your hand cramped. You promised yourself that this time you'd choose differently — someone steady, someone present, someone who actually shows up. And then, somewhere between the third coffee date and the second sleepover, the familiar feeling returns. The vague distance. The texts that arrive a beat too late. The sense that you are doing most of the reaching while they remain just slightly out of reach. An